Edmonton, Ab: A couple of recently comissioned Agency units are the source of some behind-closed-doors whispering concerning the legitimacy and worthiness of said transport. Agent 0311, in particular, is being taken somewhat to task over the purchase and refurbishment of a Toyota Tercel, while Agent 1080 basks in Presidential approval over his acquisition of yet another 440-powered, bleached cow-upholstered Chrysler NYB.
Agent 0311's mission to procure a late-model, fuel-injected reliability blob ended predictably in total failure last week with the purchase of a 26-year-old, carbureted Toyota. 0311 then added insult to injury when he comissioned a full cosmetic refurb, thus returning the ugliest car of the 1980s to something very near showroom condition.
"It looks like a calculator..." said a disbelieving 1080 upon seeing the mint Tercel for the first time, the Toshiba-esque lines of the wagon having failed to make more favorable comparisons easy.
Agent 0311, meanwhile, had little good to say about the big Chryslers that consistently find their way into 1080's garage. "The boy clearly has problems... what the hell is Lean Burn anyway?"
The President could not be reached for comment, having recently been seen bartering chickens for timing chains in the former French colonies of Africa.
There's too much hate in the world.
ReplyDeleteMe and my double rainbow Tercel are going to see to that. Not really. Oh, and I might be a hippie. And did you know that if you want to drink a beer, a legal item in Canada, at folk fest, you have to stand in corral like a farm animal where you can't see the stage. Seriously, it's 2010 people.
I agree that New Yorkers are awesome, especially if you throw empty bottles of whisky at them, but I still maintain that calculators are cool too, albeit in more of an Antiques Roadshow way.
1080 Here...
ReplyDeleteAnd I still prefer Chronometers over Calculators.
Plus Lean-Burn makes the 440 mill environmentally friendly and up with the times by eliminating the catalistic converter completely. This system IS the now.
New yorker owners are special.
Find another car that can withstand wiskey bottle blows and have full ride comfort + style. Its a very hard balance but New yorker is a 100% Drivers car, and with no skirts its very sporty. Tercels are not.
I would rather have Saturday Night Fever VS Gerorge Michael any day.
one thing I can agree with 0311 is drinking in a corral is bad, and if you can't see the stage it will cause some very angry cattle and there solution will be to make the corral smaller next year and so on. thats why I drink in my Full Size.
0311 comin' at ya:
ReplyDeleteI would just like to say that the good people at Wilson's Auto Tech thought that my Yota was pretty kick ass. AND THEY ARE GOOD PEOPLE! That's is all.
0311 out.
I would say that a compromise is in order. Based on your criteria I would suggest that the best car for both of you would be a 1985 New Yorker with the 2.6L Mitsu motor and Mikuni carburetor. That way you can have a style-less and gutless car from Chrysler's modern era. 1080 gets all Mopar good looks and quality and 0311 gets Jap efficiency and random valve train failure.
ReplyDelete