Another banner year for the Company has left the President in a dangerously celebratory mood, and he swerves as charmingly as he can from appearances to various half-remembered appointments, always with time for a G&T or a couple of monster whisky-bong rips to take the edge off. Thus equipped, the President has collected enough of his "insights" to offer a couple of bests of 2010.
Best Photo Op for a Presidential Battle Cruiser went to Agent 100013 for his all-agents, ultra-top-secret meeting, skillfully disguised as his own wedding. Amazing. Truly top-notch work, there.
The coveted Most Canadian Thing Ever award was again a nail-biter, but in the end the work entitled Rusty 1982 Chev 1/2 ton with Canopy and Canada Flag Novelty Plate, entered (without his knowledge) by Agent 747, was actually eclipsed by the President's own Tim Hortons Coffee Maker Box Radiator Blind and 1200-amp Battery in 1972 Plymouth. Wow! The President wins again!
Best Freebie was another tough call for the increasingly confused President, as he often forgets what he paid for, or just forgets to pay for things altogether. Eventually, the 1964 Rambler Cross-Country narrowly bested the 1966 Blaupunkt AM radio. Assuming neither of them is stolen. 
Best Beater (Summer) was handed to the 1972 Honda 750, just beating out Battle Cruiser #3 1972 Chrysler by virtue of its being louder and faster. It also starts with less ritual, despite having four carbur- ettors and two sets of breaker points, and gets five times better gas mileage. With all the fanfare and media pressure mounting, the President scheduled a press conference for the Saturday following the awards ceremony, but was belligerent and uncooperative when asked to defend his perennial choice of Seagrams & Canada Dry for Best Road Food.
All Agents stay tuned for more updates, to be posted as they are declassified.
Read and Burn, as usual.
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